I so needed this morning. For several days now I have had to hold my feelings in, and it has been so hard. So, this morning I come to our meeting place, and as always, I will find myself in God’s presence. I will usually begin my time with a time of praise and worship asking God to lead me to a special song or scripture, something He wants to speak to me through. The first song He put in my spirit is this song by Clay Walker I have always loved, as it speaks to my calling of being here for my Angel. But, this morning I heard the lyrics a little different; I heard the Lord speaking them to me:
Oh look there you go again
Puttin’ on that smile again
Even though I know you’ve had a bad day
Doin’ this and doin’ that
Always puttin’ yourself last
A whole lotta give and not enough take
But you can only be strong so long before you break
Go on and fall apart
Fall into these arms of mine
I’ll catch you every time you
Go on and lose it all
Every doubt every fear
Every worry every tear
I’m right here
I didn’t get past the first verse and I was gone. But, that is the great thing about our God, He is always here in our hour of need; to strengthen us and empower us to fight another day.
Last night I had to tell Jessica exactly where we are. Today, we have to tell her parents. Friends, I need your prayers more than ever. My Angel is the strong one. This message is taking so long because these waves of pain keep coming. My niece sent me a message telling me I am strong, because I am weak. In 2 Corinthians 12:9-11 The Lord did say to Paul, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” and Paul responds, “So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
Well, one thing I know, I am not Paul. But, if weakness is the criteria for the power of God to spring forth, look out world, because right now I am primed and ready for the Lord to manifest His power in my life.
Just a little more on what we have going on here. We got home around 9 pm last night and the hospice nurse was here to gets Janice’s pain pump hooked up. She seems to be doing much better this morning. Hospice is contracting with someone to bring out a hospital bed, wheel chair and other needed items. Jimmy-Lanessa Parker of you guys are in network with Deaconess Hospice please let me know as soon as possible. I would love to give you the business.
To make sure I have done everything humanly possible, I have contacted MD Anderson about clinical trials. I will be speaking to them again this morning. If there is a trial Janice qualifies for, we will take it into consideration. Right now, I just want my Angel to enjoy the time she has left, doing as much as she can, surrounded by those she loves. There is a get together planned for Janice this Saturday night. If you want to be included, please contact one of our daughters, Samantha Ashley or Jessica Lynn Pitts and they can get you more information.
I think that’s all for now. As always I will continue to update you as time allows. Thank you for all the prayers and comments. Your response has been beyond amazing. Let me leave you with this picture we came home to last night. This is my Angel standing behind this beautiful gift of love that some amazing ladies did for her. This my friends is what love looks like. We are blessed beyond words.
From my heart to yours!